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“Vanquisher of 1,000 Ravenous Nebulae”: Random villainous cognomens

June 21, 2012

Plain old “Master of the Universe”

“Yield to me, puny mortals, for I am Baalhotep!”

No, that won’t do. No self-respecting villain lacks at least one, and preferably several, vainglorious and self-aggrandising epithets appended to his or her name. After all, if the heroes don’t know your credentials, why should they tremble and cower? Let’s try that again, shall we?

“Yield to me, puny mortals, for I am Baalhotep, Scion of the Uncounted Stars, Savant of the Living City, Adept of the Five Secret Sigils!”

Now that’s more like it!

Step 1

Roll once on Table A. Amend title gender as appropriate.

Step 2

Roll 1d6. On a 1, roll twice on Table B and once on Table C. On 2-5, roll once each on Tables B and C. On a 6, roll once on Table C only. Tweak as required – “ninth” for “nine”, “serpents” for “serpent”, etc.

Step 3

Roll 1d6. On 1-3, you’re done. On 4-6, the villain has another cognomen. Go back to Step 1.

Table A (1d30)

1. Adept
2. Bastard
3. Champion
4. Chosen (One)
5. Conqueror
6. Creator
7. Duke
8. Emir
9. Emperor
10. Harbinger
11. Herald
12. Hierarch
13. Hierophant
14. Initiate
15. Jarl
16. Keeper
17. King
18. Knight
19. Lord
20. Master
21. Overlord
22. Primate
23. Prince
24. Ruler
25. Savant
26. Scion
27. Son
28. Sultan
29. Vanquisher
30. Vizier

“I am the Bastard of the Silent, Dead Abyss! Prepare to be corporeally disenfranchised!”

… of (the) …

Table B (1d60)

1. Abominable
2. Accursed
3. Black
4. Blasphemous
5. Blinding
6. Blood(y)
7. Burning
8. Chaos
9. Cold
10. Crawling
11. Creeping
12. Cryptic
13. Crystal
14. Dark
15. Dead
16. Dread(ful)
17. Ebon
18. Eternal
19. Falling
20. Five
21. Flaming
22. Forbidden
23. Gnawing
24. Great
25. Howling
26. Hundred
27. Ineluctable
28. Jade
29. Lightless
30. Living
31. Lost
32. Mighty
33. Mystic
34. Nine
35. Numberless
36. Primal
37. Purple
38. Ravenous
39. Red
40. Scarlet
41. Screaming
42. Secret
43. Seven
44. Shining
45. Silent
46. Sleepless
47. Susurrant
48. Thousand
49. Three
50. Turbulent
51. Uncounted
52. Undying
53. Unholy
54. Unknown
55. Venomous
56. Vile
57. Violet
58. Whispering
59. Yawning
60. Yellow

Table C (1d60)

“Heed me! I am Orang-Utan, Primate of the Yellow Fruit.”

1. Abyss
2. Beyond
3. Bones
4. Book
5. Castle
6. Cave(rn)
7. Chasm
8. Citadel
9. City
10. Codex
11. Cosmos
12. Dance
13. Darkness
14. Depths
15. Doom
16. Dragon
17. Dream
18. Eye
19. Flame
20. Flies
21. Fortress
22. Fruit
23. Fury
24. Gate
25. Grail
26. Hand
27. Hornets
28. Key
29. Mystery
30. Nebula
31. Night
32. Opal
33. Plain (or Plane)
34. Planet
35. Plateau
36. Prism
37. Ring
38. Scroll
39. Secret
40. Serpent
41. Shadow
42. Sigil
43. Sign
44. Skull
45. Spear
46. Sphere
47. Spider
48. Star
49. Storm
50. Sword
51. Tome
52. Tower
53. Twilight
54. Universe
55. Vault
56. Void
57. Vortex
58. Whisper
59. World
60. Worm

Yes, I know, it’s possible to roll “Lord of the Dark Darkness” or “Keeper of the Flaming Flame”. What’s your point?

I’ve made a PDF version and posted it in my Stuff.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Chawunky permalink
    June 21, 2012 11:18 pm

    I would go with a title like Keeper of the Flaming Flame. Anybody who snarks is flaming flamed.

    • June 24, 2012 11:21 am

      Something like this: “I am the Keeper of the Flaming Flame! Prepare to be flamed by my flaming flames of flame!” (Casts fireball.)

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